Don’t Piss Off the Locals: An Etiquette Guide to Surviving Hong Kong
If it’s possible to name one place in this world that has thrusted the perception of unfriendly locals to the forefront of conversation, that place would surely and unequivocally be Hong Kong.
Indeed, Google the phrase “why are Hong Kong people so…”, and a Pandora’s box of descriptors disparages itself before you: Rude, Unhappy, Impatient, Ugly, Racist*… … So notorious is the reptuation of these nation’s people that it literally secured the 29th spot on Reddit’s World’s Most Unfriendly Cities, out of more than 10,000 cities in the world. In 2022, it even made it to second place on Timeout’s 10 Most Arrogant Cities in the World.
*Disclaimer: The Hong Kong people are not racist. They dislike everyone equally.
But why take these bureaus at their polls? Do your own deep dive, and personally unearth every blog post and forum you can find about this nation’s culture of prickly people. You will soon come to realize that when you’re in Hong Kong, the chances of experiencing a brusque run-in with your average local is not only not an anomaly, it is actually almost a rite of passage. In one account, an unwitting traveller was even told by a local at a train station not to “obstruct the earth from spinning” – which, let’s face it, is as snide a remark in Cantonese as it is in English – and the author’s crime?
She was standing on the wrong side of the escalator.
It is no secret that the Hong Kongers are not a people particularly charmed or pleased – at least and definitely, not by the presence of us tourists. Although, with nuance, it is understandable why their society is better structured to breed short fuses and frayed tempers, than mindfulness and slow live-rs. It is, after all, a boiler room of ambition and relentless pace; a crucible of unyielding urgency where every second counts.
And anyone who doesn’t do their due homework to fit in, will undoubtedly in due time, stand out.
IF YOU DON’T WANT TO OFFEND THE HONG KONGERS…
1. Don’t Tell Them that They Speak Good English and Expect It to Be Taken As A Compliment
Because it is not.
I’m not even a Hong Konger and this offends me. More than once I’ve even had older foreigners purposefully slow down their speech and exaggerate the enunciation of their words when speaking to me because, I suppose when you think someone does not understand your native language, repeating what you say slower and louder is what will do the trick.
tldr: everyone in Hong Kong speaks English, and the majority of them speak it well. Even when it’s unintentional, saying stuff like this can come across as patronizing or even condescending because while you think you might be complimenting someone’s language proficiency, you’re actually just making known your stereotype about an entire country or ethnicity – and I’ll be honest, it’s a lil unpretty.
We know you don’t mean it, but it is unpretty.
2. Don’t Walk Slowly
Alongside Singaporeans, Hong Kongers are some of the fastest walkers in the world, so a surefire way to piss them off would be to disrupt the rhythm of their finely tuned orchestra by meandering leisurely through crowded sidewalks and dawdling where human traffic is surging with relentless energy.
It’s not that you have to give in to the whirlwind of motion; but you do have to be aware of your surroundings at all times. Things bustle along so quickly here that causing movement to stall- in any way or form and especially at peak hours- is enough to crown you a public nuisance (as perfectly exemplifed above).
Speaking of things obstructing the world from spinning…
3. Make Sure Your Travel Card Has Sufficient Balance Before Getting In Line
Hong Kong is one of those places you want to take on only if you are a seasoned traveller with some degree of civic responsibility. You almost have to navigate your way as if you have been living there for years. This includes, for instance, always preparing your Octopus card before getting to the barriers. (Conversely, if you like being public enemy, then simply do the opposite by fumbling around for your card only when you reach the gate.)
Making sure you have a sufficient balance also helps ensure you don’t stall the line.
4. Be Observant At All Times About How the the Locals Behave
Hong Kong is a well-oiled machine, and well-oiled machines hate it when unwitting nuts such as ourselves throw a spanner in the works, disrupting the seamless flow of their bustle as a result.
In addition to the above, also be mindful of which side to stand on the escalator (it’s the right. The left is kept clear for people in a rush); take the lift if you have bulky luggage (otherwise you’ll be blocking everyone on the escalator), and always let people alight before going into trains.
It’s a laundry list but it’s not a hard one to follow: you just have to learn to be really thoughtful and aware of other people other than yourself. As a general rule of thumb, just make sure that your presence is not inadvertently encroaching someone else’s space or slowing them down, and you’ll be fine.
5. Do Not Expect to Engage In Small Talk
Hong Kong’s reputation for being one of the most curt and unfriendly nations in the world stems, perhaps, from their general aversion to casual banter – even if they are on the service front.
It’s not that they are unfriendly; they just don’t have the patience for inefficient conversations*. You won’t get pleasantries at checkout, or be asked how’s your day by the average service member. Superficial exchanges are kept to a minimum here; and to be perfectly honest, as a person who dreads small talk, culture or not, I can really relate.
* You will be surprised how many Hong Kongers actually make for really great conversationalists when you are able to engage them in meaningful conversations.
6. Be Very Mindful of Superstitions When Gifting
On the off chance that you’re being hosted by someone in Hong Kong and want to arrive/depart with a gift, a deep dive into Chinese superstitions is mandatory. You do not want to end up gifting something that is seemingly meaningful, only to learn that it actually symbolizes something terrible, like death.
For instance, timepieces like clocks and watches are a major no-no, because 送钟/sòng zhōng (to give a timepiece) is pronounced the exact same way as 送终/sòng zhōng (to pay one’s last respects); which, even as they know you did not mean or even know it, would still come across as an inauspicious sign.
Similarly, where fashion is concerned, steer away from green headwear, as to 戴绿帽 (wear a green hat) is a metaphor that the wife is cheating on the husband. Giving them to kids is an even huger faux pas because it implies that you think they are not the biological children of their father.
To be honest, the world of Chinese superstitions is a five-thousand year old labyrinth of beliefs and traditions and customs, simmered and slow-cooked over centuries into the intricate complexity that it is today. To be safer than sorry, stop trying to figure out what you can’t gift (because it’s an endless black hole that you will sink and die in) and find out what you can gift instead. It’s alot more painless this way; and more critically, you will never go wrong.
7. Know Your Chopstick Etiquette
In addition to gift giving, you should also know that there exists an entire world of etiquette structured around two slender, remarkably non-descript tapered sticks that, on their own, look about as interesting as, well, sticks; but together, wield the power to grievously offend.
One, never cross your chopsticks (as if to form an ‘X’); for at best, it signifies that you no longer want any more food, which can be rude if the meal is still running its course. At worst, this is a harbinger of death.
Also related to death is the act of sticking your chopsticks in your bowl upright when it’s filled with rice- or leaving them in slanted when the bowl is empty. These placements make it look like an offering to the deceased, and will be taken as a bad omen.
Other dishonourable mentions include rubbing your chopsticks together (it implies that you think the chopsticks to be of inferior quality); using your personal chopsticks to lift food off sharing plates (for hygiene reasons that actually make sense); and pointing at someone with your chopsticks (a show of threat/disrespect).
8. Don’t Take The Last Piece of Food From the Centre of the Table.
In Singapore, we called it the ‘paiseh piece,’ which loosely refers to leaving the last morsels on shared plates untouched so that someone else at the table may have it. It’s an act that demonstrates generosity, as well as thoughtfulness and respect for your dining companions; and it is an integral part of Chinese dining etiquette that is well-reflected in any Chinese-dominated culture – Hong Kong included.
That said, not all is lost. If there is a last piece on the table that you feel like you are about to have an endless string of sleepless nights over, it is perfectly acceptable to ask everyone around the table if they’d like to have it – provided the course of the meal is about to end*. Once you get your unanimous ‘no’, you are free to help yourself to it.
*If you employ this tactic while the dinner is still well in its course, you will come across impulsive or boorish – or worse, as if you are prematurely hastening the conclusion of the meal.
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Comments
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Michelle
I didn’t know there was an etiquette for chopsticks and apparently I have been doing a thing to two wrong. I’ll keep your tips in mind, not just when eating in Hong Kong.
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Julia
Hello! It is very useful information. Thanks for sharing!
I think noticing something about language level sounds rude in any other countries too. -
Hannah
These are really great tips for visiting Hong Kong! I always feel anxious about accidently getting something wrong when we’re travelling and upsetting the locals. It is so helpful to know these tips and tricks to risk offending anyone in Hong Kong. I think it is really important to familiarise yourself with a few essential etiquette tips before visiting somewhere new – thank you for sharing these!
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Tasia
Wow didn’t realise they even made it to the ‘official list’. Great tip! I thought that watch are standard gifts…
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Sonia
These are extremely helpful tips. Gift giving is always tricky when visiting another country. Thank you for these insights.
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Jen
Loved reading this! My husband and his family are from Hong Kong and as a white British person heading there to visit family is certainly entertaining.
You’re absolutely right about the pace of life too. Absolutely don’t get online without enough credit 🤯
Sahana Kulur
Oh my god! Thats a lot of cultural etiquettes I wasn’t aware of about Hong Kong – Especially clocks and taking Piece of Food From the Centre of the Table. This is entertaining and also informative